Friday, July 17, 2009

Well That's ONE Way To Deal With Those Bonuses

By now, surely you have heard by now that Goldman Sachs, which has gotten a ton of your hard earned dollars, is now rolling in the dough. Oh, yeah, baby - they are handing out some major big bucks to, well, themselves. I am sure MANY of you will appreciate this:
The average Goldman worker could end up taking home more than 10 times the typical American family's income.

Woohoo - aren't you SO proud that your money has helped to buoy up this company? Let's just make clear what that means with the whole salary thing:
Were the firm to set aside bonuses at the same rate in the second half, the compensation pool would hit a record $22.8 billion -- and the average Goldman worker would stand to make $773,000 for 2009, more than doubling their 2008 take.

That would eclipse the $662,000 Goldman spent on its average worker in 2007, according to the firm's regulatory filings. Median household income was $50,233 in 2007, according to the most recent Census Bureau data, while mean income -- the apples-to-apples comparison -- was $67,608.

And there ya have it. Doesn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?? The AVERAGE worker made close to $700,000!!!! Gee - I wonder how that compares to MOST people in this country? And how many of US got bailouts??

Hmmm, I wonder just what they are going to do with all of that money? One of my favorite satirists, Andy Borowitz, had an idea in this post:

Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department
: Sister Entities to Share Employees, Money

In what some on Wall Street are calling the biggest blockbuster deal in the history of the financial sector, Goldman Sachs confirmed today that it was in talks to acquire the U.S. Department of the Treasury.

According to Goldman spokesperson Jonathan Hestron, the merger between Goldman and the Treasury Department is "a good fit" because "they're in the business of printing money and so are we."

The Goldman spokesman said that the merger would create efficiencies for both entities: "We already have so many employees and so much money flowing back and forth, this would just streamline things."

Mr. Hestron said the only challenge facing Goldman in completing the merger "is trying to figure out which parts of the Treasury Dept. we don't already own."

Goldman recently celebrated record earnings by roasting a suckling pig over a bonfire of hundred-dollar bills.

Well, that's a bit mixed - on the one hand, they cannot do a worse job than Timmy Geithner, right? So yeah - taking over the Treasury Department might not be all that bad.

On the other hand, well, just more of our tax dollars going to roast those suckling pigs, and I don't even EAT pork! Sheesh.

Oh, Borowitz finishes out his column with these two tidbits:
Elsewhere, conspiracy theorists celebrated the 40th anniversary of NASA faking the moon landing.

And in South Carolina, Gov. Mark Sanford gave his wife a new diamond ring, while his wife gave him an electronic ankle bracelet.

Now, I can SURE see that happening with Mark and Jenny, can't you?? Uh, yeah...Too bad she didn't think of that before! Live and learn, I reckon...

Don't you just LOVE our new government?? It hands out money like candy to all the wrong people, and then wants more sacrifices from US. It's gonna be a long 3 1/2 years, isn't it?

4 comments:

Mary Ellen said...

Heck...I still haven't gotten my sparkly pony and I'm still looking for that beautiful rainbow to appear over my house everyday that Obama is in office.

Not only has Obama given money to the wrong people, but he has also opened the door for corporations all over the country to screw their employees with wanton abandon.

Case in point (and I know this is going on just about everywhere in corporate America)--My husband works as a research scientist in a small company which has been bought out by Honeywell. It used to be owned by Dow. Since Honeywell has taken over (about a year ago), they have cut out all health insurance for retiree's, cut the stock match donation for their 401K's from a 100% match to 50% (how long do you think it will be before that number shrinks even more?) AND they are forcing unpaid week-long furloughs every quarter.

Now, the furlough thing is being used by some companies because they say they have no choice because otherwise they will have to have lay-off's. In this case, however, the company my husband works for has been doing great, plenty of clients and profits were/and still are, high. Honeywell bean counters (who nothing about how to run a research facility) have decided that they want even more profit and the best and easiest way for their CEO's to get those big bonuses is to force furlough's which gives them $10 million extra cash for each week they cut.

Needless to say, they are bleeding the small company dry. Clients are going to walk because they can't get the research data they paid for because the experiments have to keep shutting down. Moral is at an all time low and company loyalty is a forget it. What it all boils down to, as soon as there is any sign of the economy picking up and jobs in research open up, they will lose all their best scientists. My husband has already put the word out that he's looking for another job. His reputation is his field is extremely good and when this company he is working for now got wind 10 years ago that he was leaving BP Amoco, they jumped at the chance to get him.

But Honeywell doesn't care, the scientists are nothing but a commodity to them and they will bleed them dry until the company collapses. Then they'll take their profits and buy another small company and bleed them dry.

This is pure greed, not economics. It's Obama Economics.

Sorry for the rant...I'm so fed up with the greedy corporations that Obama is courting.

Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy said...

No kidding, right?? I'm looking out the window right now - no rainbow nor pony!!!!

Very cool abt your husband being a scientist, btw. That's just cool!!

And I have to say - maybe because I try to believe the best, I am surprised that the whole unpaid work thing is simply to line the pockets of the executives, and has nothing to do with keeping the company going. That just SUCKS, ME. I mean, really - it is downright sinful, don't you think? They are putting out this whole meme that they are just trying to keep their employees, blah, blah, blah, but instead, they are just paying themselves more.

Grrrrr.

I don't blame your husband ONE bit for looking elsewhere. Hey, BPAmoco has a place down here - mighty nice here! :-D

Mary Ellen said...

Amy- As much as I would love to move there, my mom and mother-in-law live here and we can't just uproot them, it would be devastating for them. And we can't leave them behind, they need me here to care for them. Anyway....BP is notoriously bad businessmen--which is why their stock is always so much lower than Exxon. My husband left there because they were dumping all their research with the bright idea that they could do better by buying it from another company (such as the one my husband works at). Then they realized, after all their best scientists left, that it costs them more to buy it from someone else. Well...duh!!! They are trying to revamp it, but my husband said that they can't be trusted not to pull the same stunt again. They really put the screws to a bunch of their engineers, too. They transferred a bunch of Illinois to Texas, uprooted their families, and three months after they were in Texas, they laid them all off. They had put their kids in news schools, bought homes, the wives had to find other jobs...and then they got the boot.

There's a special place in hell for the CEO's and bean counters who make those decisions, IMO.

And yeah..it's is way cool that he's a scientist, but I swear, he can be so stupid when it comes to politics....he's an Obot.

Rabble Rouser Reverend Amy said...

Ah - so your husband is still an Obot. He doesn't see the connection between what these companies are doing and Obama's part in all of that? I guess if you couldn't convince him, no one could, because you are mighty astute.

I'm not surprised to hear that abt BPAmoco. An old friend of mine worked as a chemist at the one here, and was downsized after the merger. He had worked there for YEARS, and out he went! They did give him an okay severance package, but that's a pretty specialized field - not a whole lot of other opportunities along those lines here.

Anyhoo - I can imagine he is very frustrated by all of this.

Oh, I hear ya abt your mother and mother-in-law. You are a GOOD daughter for being so devoted to them. Believe you me, that is rare indeed. (I wish I could have gotten my mom to move down here before her stroke - my middle brother and I are the ones who do the most for her. My middle brother is moving back to my home town next weekend, thank heavens. But still, I would be able to see her more if she lived in the area rather than a four hour drive each way...)

In that case, you'll just have to come visit! :-D